In a relationship, this can look like going silent on a partner, changing the subject, or enduring uncomfortable situations instead of expressing issues openly. When Tim discovers the details of Suzie’s spending, he is devastated. He confronts Suzie and she defends herself, “I did not want to fight. You were already dealing with a lot of work stress.” Essentially, Suzie omits discussing her self-serving activity to free herself of responsibility.
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However, some disadvantages make it a risky option in many cases, so it needs to be used wisely, which will be discussed in the next section. This section will examine the advantages and disadvantages of avoiding conflict style and outline how it can impact conflict situations. The avoiding style, which is the focus of this article, focuses on how to avoid confrontation rather than how to resolve the conflict. The most important thing for the avoidant person is to protect their inner peace rather than fighting with others to get what they would like. It can often result in a win-lose solution and does not fully resolve the issue or can prolong it if the other party is unable to encourage them to participate in the solution. It can make the process time-consuming and may result in a quick or unpopular decision to avoid further discussion.
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There are five styles of conflict management, which we will discuss in turn. Each has positive and negative aspects that can be used and abused in conflict. It can also negatively affect physical intimacy in a relationship. When two people avoid conflict, it can often lead to a decrease in physical intimacy. This happens because when two people are not communicating, they are not connecting on a physical level either. Physical intimacy is about connection, and when there is no communication, there is no connection.
Why Is Addressing Workplace Conflict Important?
- When we compete, we are striving to “win” the conflict, potentially at the expense or “loss” of the other person.
- Guide your team toward collaboration or compromise, and work toward a solution that achieves the goal while maintaining—and even strengthening—relationships.
- Conflict resolution is about standing up for yourself and communicating when you feel angry or frustrated.
- Remember that disagreeing provides deeper understanding and makes it easier to connect with our friends, partners, and co-workers.
- We confirm enrollment eligibility within one week of your application for CORe and three weeks for CLIMB.
By being aware of the signs of conflict avoidance and using these tips for dealing with conflict healthily, you can start to have healthier and more productive conversations with your partner. The how to deal with someone who avoids conflict desire to avoid conflict in a relationship is common, but for very different reasons. First, involvement with a partner who is unable to perspective-take makes it nearly impossible to work out difficulties constructively.
- All participants must be at least 18 years of age, proficient in English, and committed to learning and engaging with fellow participants throughout the program.
- The compromising style shows a moderate concern for self and other.
- The accommodating conflict management style indicates a low concern for self and a high concern for other, and is often viewed as passive or submissive, in that someone complies with or obliges another.
- Understandably, a person may wish to avoid these nightmare fights by side-stepping the power struggles.
- Use accommodating in instances where the relationship matters more than your goal.
- Vaughn’s behind-the-scenes money giving or Amal’s confiscation of the ATM card could lead to built-up negative emotions that could further test the relationship.
What Your Conflict Resolution Style Says About You and Is It Healthy?
A power struggle may ensue and often the dogmatic partner frequently resorts to unscrupulous means to “win.” The person on the opposite end tends to feel disrespected and demeaned. He or she is usually left with two choices; to surrender or counter in an equally ugly manner. When we avoid conflict with those we continue to interact with, we allow it to fester and grow. Imagine that you hear that you hurt a coworker’s feelings with a thoughtless remark. You feel awkward about the situation and unsure about how to bring it up.
